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You are here: Birth >> Parenting >> New mum >> Partner returns to work - emotional considerations

Partner returns to work - emotional considerations

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Partner returns to work - emotional considerations

The following are some possible emotional considerations that may come up for parents when the father returns to work.

The mother
The father

For the mother feeling:

	Sad and grieving. The lovely 'baby moon' is over and now it is time to cope with the 'real world'. Missing your partner's help, support and companionship.
	Isolated and very much alone. This feeling can become magnified if there is little to no support network available.
	Overwhelmed and teary when their partner returns to work for the first day or so. The responsibility of caring for the new baby (and possibly siblings) alone can leave many women feeling daunted, until they settle into a routine.
	Relief and contentment. You prefer to have the 'run of the ship' (so to speak) and your 'stay at home partner' was becoming a little trying at times.
	Resentment. He can leave the house whenever he wants, and return to his career and a relatively normal and predictable life (at least during work hours).
	Loss of independence and control over finances. This is very common, especially when going from two wages to one. Some women will have their own money put aside to use during their maternity leave, but others may have limited or no funds of their own and need to rely solely on their partners financial support. Some women find the need to continually ask their partner for money every time they need to purchase something, causes a growing problem of resentment and frustration. The woman can also start to feel she is no longer contributing to the relationship, impacting on her self-esteem. It is important to discuss this issue well in advance and set up finances (such as joint accessible accounts or individual credit card facilities) to suit everyone's needs.

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