Women (and their partners and family) can experience many diverse emotions around episodes of threatened preterm labour, preterm labour and birth of a preterm baby. If the baby(s) is mildly preterm then the labour could just be a bit of a surprise. It may even be welcomed by women tiring of the pregnancy and its discomforts (especially if there are twins or more). However, if the baby(s) is moderately or extremely preterm the events unfolding can be a crisis situation where things can feel out of control, seeming quite surreal as they unfold.
Most parents find it hard to even come to terms with what is happening at the time and will switch to 'survival mode' to cope. This can be compounded if the mother and / or baby(s) are unwell.
Frequent episodes of threatened preterm labour can be frightening, upsetting and frustrating. Often the woman and the caregiver are unsure whether anything is actually happening. However, it is common to take the 'better to be safe than sorry' approach. If the woman does not live close to a hospital with a level 3 intensive care nursery, then she may need to be transferred away from her home for various periods of time. This can be very lonely as well as disruptive for relationships and other children (if this is the case). Being in hospital for very long periods may be necessary if the waters have broken preterm. This can produce an often nerve-wracking, tentative wait.
If the birth becomes inevitable then feelings of vulnerability, guilt and concern that the baby(s) will be all right are usually most frequent. While caregivers can give guides as to how the baby(s) will be, this will not truly be known until the babies are born.
Once the baby(s) is born the path that follows can be a roller coaster of feelings. The often unpredictable recovery of preterm babies will mean their health expectations may not be clear for days or weeks after the birth.